Thursday, October 30, 2008
Master Cleanse, here I come
If any of you have read about the Master Cleanse, you will recall with me that it is probably the most vile suggestion you've ever heard. This cleanse is one that suggests drinking 2 liters of a lemon juice-maple syrup-cayenne pepper "lemonaid" per day, as well as downing a liter of salt water (per day) in order to completely clear out one's insides. This liter of salt water results in numerous tummy-rumblings and consequential trips to the restroom.
I did this said cleanse (minus salt water) for approximately 2 days back when I lived in New Orleans. The suggested duration is anywhere from 3 days to two weeks. My taste buds weren't convinced that I needed the third day.
Yesterday, Christopher casually informed me that our friends are planning to do the cleanse for 10 days beginning this weekend. He also made the mistake of saying that if I wanted to do it, he'd be game. Well of COURSE I want to do the cleanse. I live for this stuff. I'm a believer in giving our bodies a break and cleaning out all the gunk; I also believe that giving up food for a while gives us opportunity to focus on other things.
So on Monday morning, we will begin The Master Cleanse. I will juice lemons, measure maple syrup and add the cayenne pepper to only a small "shot" of this mixture so I don't have to sip it throughout the day (it's so gross). I will drink the salt water. I will drink the salt water. I will drink the salt water. I will drink....
Oh, sorry. I forgot you were reading. Where was I? Oh, yea...I'll drink the salt water and enjoy the cleanliness of my insides.
And I will be forced to find something to make me happy besides what is passing over my taste buds.
Master Cleanse, here I come. And be warned...this time, I will master you.