Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Today for you, tomorrow for me

Here's my question. How often do you think we live our lives thinking the subject of this post? "Okay, you get today, but tomorrow is for me."

I think I do it subconsciously, and I think it sounds more like this, "Yesterday (last week/last month/last year/etc.) was for you. Today is for me." I'm done trying to help you or think beyond my own 4 walls. I'm making today ALL about me.

It's unfortunate, because usually the 'yesterday' went really well. I can spend a day or a week thinking of someone else, but once it's over, it's like the rubber band effect. I'm done. I don't like that I have the capacity for this behavior. It disappoints me. It makes me sad for the other people in my life that I can be so selfish. I really do try, but there are days that I just fail miserably. And the worst part is that I fail because I want to...or because I decide to...not because I unknowingly do something ugly to someone. I absolutely know that I'm making decisions based on what Leanne wants and nothing else.

Does anyone else feel this way? If so, what are your thoughts and/or learnings on this topic?


Rachel said...

I totally thought this post was going to be about "Rent".

Lela said...

haha. I knew there would be some people who'd get it. :o)

photoqueen said...

I thought it was going to be about Evan! ha ha, but no, I am by nature selfish, which is why two boys are driving me MAD!

Thank the Lord for my mom who let me get my nails done yesterday...it's small moments like that, that gets me to the next one...

A balance of giving and receiving is ok.